Ordinary Acts of Kindness
Hello Friends -
We have been working hard this summer, and it has been wonderful getting to see so many of you! Our connection with you means the world to us.
One issue that has been coming up in our practice quite frequently this summer is exhaustion from experiencing a lack of consideration and kindness. Life can be stressful enough – and being confronted with unkindness is difficult! What can make matters worse is when we take other people's lack of consideration and unkindness personally.
We may ask ourselves:
What is wrong with me that they are treating me this way?
Did I do something wrong?
We can also make excuses for other people's poor behavior:
They must be having a bad day.
He's hurt. That's why he says the things he says.
She's so busy, she doesn't have time to be polite.
We must all take responsibility for our actions and not excuse poor behavior, even our own. Let's review some examples that do not contribute to a positive experience of life and, if applicable, do something different:
When you walk in front of where someone else is looking at the store or even at home, say, "Excuse me."
If you are late for lunch with your friend, shoot them a quick text to let them know you are on your way and apologize for not honoring their time by being on time yourself.
If someone is kind enough to babysit for you, return when you say you will return.
When the driver in front of you makes a mistake, give some grace. Unkind gestures and shouts of anger only make things worse.
Don't text while you are driving or even look at your phone!
When you attend a group meeting where contributions are appreciated, contribute! Nothing makes someone feel disheartened more than when people take advantage of their generosity.
Pay your bills on time. Obviously, this is the respectful thing to do and makes YOU feel good.
Save your fighting for private places – not at the store, in a parking lot, or at the park where others will be impacted.
Be a polite traveler. Honor your space and give others theirs.
If you love to get up and dance at a concert, make sure you aren't blocking the view of the person behind you. Watching your alcohol consumption is also helpful because everyone has to contend with you if you don't.
If you make a mistake, do your best to rectify it. Apologies can go a long way – actions go even further!
Respond to emails and texts in a timely manner if you can. We all get sick and go through hard times, but simply ignoring others' communication with you is not kind (unless you do not want to have a relationship with them).
If you know someone doesn’t want to see you or hear from you, leave them alone.
Treat your work colleagues with respect. Honor meeting times, arrive to work on time, and please do not gossip. Gossip is toxic in all situations!
Appreciate your friends and family. If they have you over for a barbeque, thank them. If you know they have worked hard on a project, encourage them. If they help you with something you couldn't do by yourself, let them know your gratitude. Unfortunately, people seem to take advantage of those close to them and forget that manners and expressions of gratitude matter.
If you have more to add to our list, let us know. It's good to review ordinary acts of kindness and consideration from time to time. It makes life better for all of us!
Annette and Ada